I've been seeing 'The Man' for 10 weeks now and during that time I've mainly managed to hide what a complete f*ckwit I actually am....until last night!!!
I was having a quiet relaxing bath when Chick shouted up that there was someone at the door. Being the classy Mum that I am, I told her to open the letter box and see who it was and then report back to me before she opened the door. She shouts back up that it's 'The Man' and should she let him in!!???!!! Erm....yes babe, that would be a good idea!!
So 'The Man' comes up to say hello and we're just finishing being all steamy when Chick shouts up to us at the top of her voice that the sink was overflowing and the kitchen floor was flooded. Well I'm wondering WTF is going on and why she's left the tap on. So I come running down the stairs in just my towel and discover that she is quite right in her shouting and that the kitchen is like a paddling pool. To make things worse the taps are not running and the sink is spewing water everywhere!!!
I paddle across the kitchen floor to the sink and start yanking out all the crap from underneath to see that actually nothing is leaking at all. We (obviously when I say 'we' I mean 'the man'!!) finally figure out that the sink is blocked and that all the water from the washing machine is what is cascading so prettily from the kitchen sink.
The man asked me where the stopcock was. Me: I'm a girl, I don't know!!
The man asked me where I keep my plunger. Me: I'm a girl I don't have one.
Me: erm.....maybe I'll put some clothes on and go ask a neighbour.
Him: hmmmmm, that might be an idea!
So we chuck loads of towels on the floor to soak it up and whilst I'm out trying to source a plunger 'the man' miraculously unlocks the sink! (hurrah for having a man around the house!!)
Him: I wonder what blocked it?
Me: *having a flashback*
Me: I think it may have been fat from the meal I cooked the other night.
Him: And you poured it down the sink??
Him....laughing his arse off at me whilst I try and mop a whole washing machine of water off of the floor!!!
And that my friends is a typical night in with me!!! God knows what the poor bloke sees in me :-)