Wednesday 31 March 2010

And the Winner is.......

Thank you to everyone who entered Friday's giveaway.  The winner is announced here:



To claim your prize all you need to do is e-mail me and let me know where to send the DVD to.  I'm quite excited by this Friday's giveaway so make sure you come by and check it out!

* If any lovely Companies out there have products they would like me to giveaway please feel free to contact me!!!!

Tuesday 30 March 2010

There is NO nakedness here!!!!!

The post that I had written for today was titled 'The end of the Kitchen Saga (finally)' but then the Lovely Lottie tagged me in a photo meme so you'll have to wait until Thursday for the Kitchen story!

For the purposes of this Meme I have to show you the 10th oldest photo in my albums.  I read Lottie's blog today when I was at work and saw that she had tagged me and then I spent the rest of the day Twittering panicking about the fact that it may be a naked one of me! (erm......only joking Mom of course I don't have any naked pictures of me xxx)

Well this of course poses several problems for me, not least the fact that I tend to take millions of pictures of random stuff (like churches, chick or shoes) and I obviously don't want to look a complete trog so I did what most other sane people would do and decided to cheat!!!  This is my 10th normal picture:


This is me & Chick in Scotland back in 2006 at Glenfinnan!  But then I thought about it and because I like to set a good example to my Daughter and only really cheat when playing cards, I decided to be honest..........my number 10 picture was actually this:


To those of you that know my very well this picture will come as no surprise!  To those of you who don't know me very well.....Hi! My name is Emma....I'm a Shoe Addict!!!!!!!

I know that I'm going to sound like a complete fruit loop admitting to this but I take pictures of all of my shoes and put them on the front of my shoe boxes.  It's not because I have severe OCD (honest!!) but because I have so many pairs that if I didn't have pictures on them it would take me an extra hour to get ready in a morning!!!!  You can see a picture of my collection of my going out shoes here!*

* Warning you probably don't want to look at this if you despise materialistic people....please don't hate me!!!

So now I have to tag some other poor souls to open up their photo albums!!!  I nominate:

1. Emma at Me, The Man & The Baby

2. Chrissie at Mediocre Mum

3. Chanel from Over Active Ovaries

4. Rachael at Marathon Mummy

5. Heather at Our Incredible Journey

Sorry Ladies!!!  Here's what you need to do:

1. Open the first (oldest) photo folder in your computer library
2. Scroll to the 10th photo.
3. Post the photo and the story behind it
4. Tag 5 or more people to continue the thread and link back to me!

Monday 29 March 2010

It was acceptable in the 80's.....

My lovely Sister in Law turned 30 back at the beginning of March but only just got around to having a partay as they were off on a very belated honeymoon in Australia!  The theme of the party was the 1980's.....cue more fab outfits than you can shake a pineapple and cheese stick at!!!!!  This is the Birthday Girl and Tom:


Me posing at the start of the night in all my backcombed glory:


This is me, Chris and Nick in the Mid-80's (my little brother Ben wasn't born until the 90's!!!!):


I know!  We were just the cutest things ;-)  This is us now rocking the 80's look:


I know!  We're still so cute right!!!???? It was the funniest night out I've had in ages and was an absolute blast!!!!  I tried to upload a video of us singing to Belinda Carlisle but it's your lucky day Readers because it wouldn't work!!!  I think I need to visit the 80's more often!

What's your favourite era?  Care to share any pics with the rest of us?  You can leave a link in the comment section  or Twitter me at emmylouvic if you have some glorious pics for us to giggle at???!!!!

Saturday 27 March 2010

My First Giveaway!!!

I'm excited to be doing my first giveaway today!!!  I hope to make this a regular thing but we'll see how the next couple of weeks go before I make any promises! To tie in with 'Extract' being released at English cinemas yesterday and following on from my interview with John Altschuler I have a copy of the DVD to give away. So a little blurb about the film:


The creator of Office Space, writer-director Mike Judge (Beavis and Butt-Head), moves from cubicles to the assembly line with Extract -- his outrageous return to workplace comedy, featuring a hilarious ensemble cast of quirky characters. About to sell his successful flavor extract company, life is almost sweet for Joel (Jason Bateman) until a freak on-the-job accident happens. Add to that his bored wife (Kristen Wiig), his laid-back, stoner best friend (Ben Affleck), a sexy con artist (Mila Kunis) who blows into town with dollar signs in her bedroom eyes, and a dumb gigolo -- and life as he knows it turns sour. Filled with laugh-out-loud one-liners and raunchy comedy, EXTRACT is 100% pure hilarity.


Got to be worth watching for Jason Bateman and Ben Affleck alone!!!!! As it's my first giveaway I'll go easy on you this week....all you need to do is leave me a comment on this post or yesterdays interview telling me how fabulous I am!!!!!   

Winners will be picked out of a hat by Chick on Wednesday 31st March and will be posted on that day.  I'm quite happy to send the DVD anywhere so my American and Australian darlings can feel free to enter too.  Good Luck!


(Disclosure - I wasn't paid for this but I did receive a free DVD!)

Friday 26 March 2010

The Big Hollywood Interview!!!!

On Tuesday night I found myself having a chat with Hollywood Writer/Producer John Altschuler one of the guys behind of King of the Hill who also co-wrote the Will Ferrell film Blades of Glory. He was talking to me about his new film ‘Extract’ which is released in English Cinemas today.

I spent some time setting things up.....Chick was threatened with the Easter Bunny never making another appearance if she so much as muttered down the stairs, PJ’s on but hair and face done just in case I had to use the webcam, glass of wine in hand.  I then turned my attention to the proper stuff such as getting out the dictaphone to record the conversation and guess what it didn’t work.  Never mind! My memory along with old fashioned paper and pen will have to do so here goes (but forgive me if I use some English words in John’s answers as I only have rough notes!!!):


John!  How are you?  I understand you are in LA, what’s the weather like there today?

It’s like Paradise.  High 70’s and sunny! (jealous much?  Yes, yes I am!!!!)

That’s great.  The weather here is rubbish...lots of rain!  So what can you see from your office window.....the ocean or the Hollywood sign?

Erm....A Courtyard with people eating lunch on side and on the other side the Street.

Very rock ‘n’ roll then! What interview question do you get asked all the time that you really hate?

I don’t really dislike any of the questions but I’m not always sure about the answers I give in case they are boring!

Today your new film Extract is being released in England can you tell me a little about it?

It’s a very excellent Mike Judge movie.  It has a fantastic, comedic cast including Jason Bateman, Mila Kunis and Ben Affleck.  I’m excited about it opening in Britain as we are often told that our humour is too British as it’s very dry and observational.  I think it causes you to laugh involuntarily.

Sounds good but why should my blog readers spend good money going to see it at the Cinema?

Funny Americans (John’s words not mine!!!)

What was the most fun about working on the movie?

The most fun thing was walking in on the first day and there being a Directors chair with my name on it.  I know that sounds vain but I first came to Hollywood 22 years ago and did every crummy job imaginable to get to this point.  To somehow pull it all together and have the Directors chair was just fun.

How did you persuade Ben Affleck to go with the long haired hippy look?

Oh man he took no persuading at all.  As soon as they put the wig on he turned into this complete other character.  You know it was a small budget film (under $7million) and on a Mike Judge film everybody is there because they want to be.  So Ben came in and discussed it with Mike who wanted a Hipster character and that’s what he became and loved it!

What was the worst thing about filming?

Well it was mainly good and everyone was excited as it was all filmed in LA. The cast and crew were all behind the movie but it’s filmed in a bottle plant in the City of Commerce which is the industrial part of LA and the drive there each day was absolutely hell.

So what’s your guilty pleasure t.v. wise is it Desperate Housewives or Glee or something similar? (Thanks to Miss Lucy Halford for this question!)

All of my t.v. watching is a guilty pleasure but yes Glee is one of them

You obviously have good taste in T.V. as I love Glee too!!  Who is the most demanding actor or actress you’ve ever worked with? (Thanks to Linda Kennedy for this question!!)

Bruce Gurn who was a big star back in the 70’s and did a voice for us on King of the Hill.  He was quite a handful.

What has been your favourite project that you’ve worked on?

Everything that I’ve worked on has been good and I liked it.  Blades of Glory was excellent for a stupid movie but I’m most proud of Extract as it’s smart and funny with a humour few can pull off.

Which Character do you wish you’d invented?

Bobby Hill from King of the Hill because that kid was me.  It’s amazing and people have even said how he’s like me.  He isn’t smart or talented he’s just a normal kid.

I read somewhere that you and Dave Krinsky (John’s writing partner) met at Uni.  How did you go from uni friends to Hollywood screen writers/producers?

Well we graduated from College and I told Dave that we needed to go to Hollywood.  Dave agreed so we packed up my Dodge Colt and drove across America.  We started as production assistants which is basically a gopher role!  I sometimes think we had the ugliest path in Hollywood.  We got by doing any jobs and selling some work and then after 12 years we got a steady job.  By that time we were ready for it so able to capitalise on it.

What do you dislike most about working with Dave?

(he thought about this one for a while) I think I hate the fact that everybody thinks Dave is nicer.  If they have a problem they all go to him!

My blog is called Adventures of an English Mum.  What's the most wild adventure you've ever been on?

My wife and I trying to get my 3 and 5 year old through Orly airport to make our connection to Rome.  One kid was asleep, the other was throwing up and we realized the French did not care whether we made or flight or not.  Somehow the adrenaline kicked in and we made it.  Oh, and living by myself in a mobile home when I was 15 was quite an adventure, but that's another story.

And with that I say my goodbyes to John in sunny LA, sign off from Skype and have another couple of gulps of Pinot before phoning my friends and squealing like a girl that I just got off the phone with someone from Hollywood....What? Y’all know I’m easily impressed???

Come back tomorrow for my first giveaway and the chance for you to win a copy of ‘Extract’ on DVD!!!

Thursday 25 March 2010

A Favour Please...

Feeling really rough today as I have yet another viral and ear infection so only a quick post but can I say a HUGE thank you to everyone who commented on the post about my Dad.  It's lovely to know that so many of you love me and are there when I need you.  I think I cried at every comment as they were all so nice and I'm such a girl!!!!

So now my lovely readers I have a couple of favours to ask.  First of all I know I'm being very cheeky but if you could make friends with me on the Google connect button on the right I'd be altogether grateful.....you can never have enough friends right??? (I'm totally stealing this idea from the lovely and dedicated Marathon Mummy)  Just a couple of you would be fine so that I have a nice round 10 followers ;-)  Don't worry if you don't want to though, I won't be offended!!!!

My second favour is a bit more of an ask.  On the first weekend of July I'm attending a Blogging conference called CyberMummy.  They are asking attendees to nominate their favourite post and will pick 10 Bloggers to then read the post to the audience at the conference and as I'm always up for a challenge I thought I'd nominate one.  Now I don't expect you to trawl back through the archives but if you have a favourite post that sticks in your memory or that you really enjoyed (maybe even from my Wordpress days) then I shall nominate that one.

Now I must dash as Chick is a business person in the school play this afternoon and I want to bag a front row seat to try and get some decent pictures!

Wednesday 24 March 2010

Tuesday 23 March 2010

House of Pain

I try and pretend that I'm quite a together person that can juggle Chick, work, home and everything else.  However sometimes (thankfully not often) it's all a charade and underneath it all I'm only just managing to keep up appearances and during this particular month it always hits me hardest.  You see right now is the midway point between by Dad's birthday and the anniversary of when he died.

My Dad committed suicide when I was 17 and even though it's been sixteen years, I still struggle.  His birthday is the one day a year that my brother Chris just 'phones for a chat' but this year he wasn't around to be able to call and strangely it seemed to hit me harder than ever.

For the first five years after Dad died I was a complete mess and actually what saved my ass was working out in California and being away from all the bullshit that was going on at home.   From the start of March for six weeks you could always find me getting ridiculously drunk every single night and behaving wildly inappropriately or crying on the phone to my Mum at 3am because I was so drunk that I couldn't control the flow of tears and only she or Chris could calm me down.

As the years have passed instead of going all out crazy, I ignore it!  I know.....really mature huh!  I very rarely talk about him to anyone even Chick because it's so painful I just can't go there.  I'm sure that burying all my feelings along with my Dad isn't the way to handle things but even now I'm not sure where to start.

It's funny the things you remember.  My dad worked for Mattel when were little so birthdays were a living room full of the brightest and best that they offered....Barbies, Poochie and Rainbow Brite to name but a few!  Going out as a family and him jumping out of bushes on the way home to scare us.  Shopping trips...he loved shopping!!  Talking about the places we'd travel too, he always wanted to go to San Francisco.

My Dad and I had in no way a perfect relationship and there were a lot of other issues going on in his life that were the apparent cause of his suicide.  I've spent many years hating my Dad for killing himself without giving us a thought, even more so since Chick was born.

My Mum and Dad also had a very acrimonious divorce and both spent a lot of years mudslinging and playing us off against the other one so we always felt torn.  In the end Mum moved us away and we only saw Dad occasionally and he let us down a lot. Never turning up when he said he would or not arriving at all. Missed birthdays and arguments.  I'm pretty sure it was aimed at my Mum however when you are a 10 year old and your Dad doesn't turn up on your birthday or send you a present.....life sucks!!

There's a song called 'House of Pain' by Faster Pussycat that goes something like

  It's a little past supper time
  I'm still out on the front porch
  Sittin on my behind, waiting for you
  Wondering if everything was all right
  Momma said come in boy don't waste your time
  I said I got time he'll be here soon

That's what I remember being like when I was younger.  The times I sat outside all day and waited for my Dad, convinced that he would turn up and he never did.  It must've broken my Mum's heart to watch!  The worse thing is that tonight Chick's Dad couldn't come and she had a full scale meltdown that reminded me of what I used to be like but he at least phoned and explained to her why.  Maybe I'll send him the link to this so he understands why I go off like a rocket when he lets her down!!

Please excuse any spelling errors but I've sat and cried for the whole time I've been writing, the screen is very blurry and I can't bear to read back what I've just typed on this occasion! I wrote this in the vain hope that I'll actually be able to sleep tonight now I've got all this out of my brain. Anyway I'm going to put away my feelings, wash my face, pull myself together, reassure my girl that I'm not having a nervous breakdown and prepare for my big Hollywood interview....wish me luck!!!!  


Saturday 20 March 2010

Letters of Intent

Foursons

Spoiled kids? Spoiled spouse? Spoiled dinner? Are you cranky, tired, sick, tired of being sick and tired?  Then grab a button from Julie at Foursons and write your own letter.

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Dear Hertz

You still suck!

Love me

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Dear Bra

I understand that I put you under a lot of strain but seriously you couldn't have found a better place to snap in half???  In the Town Centre on the only Saturday I don't have my handbag or cash card with me is not a helpful place to break and as you are quite aware the girls aren't as firm and pert as they used to be so being without your support is quite traumatic for all concerned!!!

Love me

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Dear Public House

I'm not sure who's idea it was to have a cobbled garden but you know we live in England right, where it rains a lot?  People who've had a glass of wine or two and slippy wet cobbles are not a great combination.  Mix the two and you may get a sprained ankle!!!!  You will be hearing from my Lawyer if and when I ever recover enough to hobble to the telephone!!!!

Love me

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Dear Council

Thank you for your very informative letter today instructing me on how to place my dustbin outside my house on the appropriate day.  I don't know how I've managed these last 15 years of being an official adult without your help.  Thank you also for informing me that I will be charged £110 by the Litter Police if I do not move the bin from the street quickly enough on said day.  It's good to know that the £1500 a year that I pay in Council Tax is being put to such tremendous use.

Love me 


Thursday 18 March 2010

Truth or Lies?

Some things about growing up just aren't fun and dealing with other kids is one of them.  Chick is almost 7 and a half and still believes in Santa and the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy so imagine my dismay when she came home this week and told me that a boy in her class told her that Santa isn't real!!!!

Not only did he utter these devastating words but he followed them up with 'your Mum and Dad put the presents under the tree, stupid'!!!  She has also today had a similar conversation, probably with the same boy, about the Easter Bunny.  Now don't get me wrong I don't blame the child but once Chick knows I'll be imploring her not to tell any of the other kids.....would hate to be responsible for another child finding out!!!

I'd like to deal with this in such a manner that she isn't traumatised for life in discovering that these things actually don't exist, so what are my options?:

a)  Keep avoiding the subject and just make ummm and aaahhh noises when she brings it up and let realisation dawn that it probably is me.

b) Tell her the truth and add double to the Therapy fund this month!

C)  Lie.  This is my least favourite option as I try to be as truthful and open as possible with Chick....on a 7 year old level anyway!!

So what would you suggest?  Have any of you dealt with this situation and got amazing advice to offer me?

Any help would be gratefully received!!!!

Tuesday 16 March 2010

Honey, Don't bother Mummy, I'm too busy on my Soapbox!!!!

Every day when reading around various blogs I'm struck by how lucky I am and how I really need to stop bloody moaning about inconsequential things!!

For instance I take for granted mine and Chick's health. I moan about the house but at least we have a roof over our heads. I moan about paying the bills but I should be grateful that I can just afford to pay them.  I sometimes complain about work but I'm sure millions would give their left leg to be in a paid job.  I moan about Chick's Dad but at least he's semi involved which is more than can be said for a lot of men.

I'm sure that I've also moaned before about how women can't really win.  If we stay at home we are supposedly sponging off our 'husbands'.  If we go out to work then we are terrible Mothers. See....we just can't win and this is why articles about Mummy Bloggers such as the one in the Sunday issue of New York Times really bother me! (I linked to it yesterday!!)

So what if we blog about Mummy stuff?  We are Mums and I sure as hell wish I would've had this online network of people when Chick was a baby to discuss milestones or problems with, without worrying about sounding like an idiot!

So what if some of us can make it into a business?  Surely the fact that we get the best of both worlds in staying at home with the kids and making a living ought to be applauded and we should be singing their praises as Super Mummies?

So what if we get offered free stuff.  Again when I was at home with Chick as a baby a few free packs of nappies or a highchair would've made a massive difference to me and even now if people want to send me free stuff why should I say no as long as I'm not selling my soul to write about it?

So what if some get offered free trips to Disney or the Olympics or the Oscars. In this day and age a lot of us can't afford a break so if Disney offered me a free trip in return for blogging about it and sharing pictures I'd be all 'Hell Yeah'!!!! I'd also like to meet the person who would turn down a free trip to the Olympics or Oscars!!

Anyways now I'm going to step off my soapbox and spend some time listening to my daughter read before bed even though that's so 2008!!!!!  Then I will go and spread some comment love around and spend the rest of the night reminding myself just how lucky I am :-)

Monday 15 March 2010

A Picture Post!

I could write a post today about how the New York Times reckon us Mummy Bloggers can be talked to in a derogatory manner however I'm too busy building my brand and neglecting my child to be bothered to retaliate!!!!!

As you know my weekend plan was to stay offline which I kinda managed.  I did check my Blog a couple of times and have a peek at Twitter but other than that I was quite good.  So on Saturday we had a movie day and made it to the brilliance that is 'Alice in Wonderland'....this is us looking like complete goofballs in our 3D glasses:

Then in the evening we watched New Moon (again) and I came to the conclusion that it is wrong to even think about lusting after men that are almost young enough to be my son......no matter how buff and beautiful!!!!

Also it was Mothers Day in England on Sunday and I woke up to this lovely booty courtesy of Chick (with a little help from Sarah!):


How well do they know me???  We even managed to fit in a quick trip to the local museum:


Chick looks a bit demonic in the picture but I can assure you that she's not (generally!!!).  Fab weekend all in all and now I'm off to 'hide vegetables in my child's food' and 'drink mimosas from a plastic cup'!!!!!!!

Friday 12 March 2010

I have a confession to make

Dear Readers

My name is Emma and I’m a Blogaholic!!!!  I think it may be overtaking my life to the detriment of all the other stuff that I should actually be doing. 

Since we got back from Australia I’ve been kind of on a mini self destruct session.  I don’t mean self destruct as in running around the Village Green naked but just not taking care of myself properly.  I’m back to pigging out on chocolate, drinking too much vodka, not exercising, not sleeping enough and just opting out of normal life in general.

Some of this is due to the fact that I spend many, many hours online reading blogs, commenting on blogs, networking with other bloggers and Twittering.    I had a bit of a Eureka moment when reading Theta Mom’s blog on a similar subject, but what I’ve discovered is that it’s just me putting pressure on myself.  Too much pressure to comment, to read as many blogs as possible, too get my name out there and some days I find it all a chore.

I love this whole blogging community and the new friends that I’ve made.....some of whom I’m going to get to meet at CyberMummy in July...which I just cannot wait for.  However I just don’t have the time or energy to keep trying to ‘promote’ my blog as it were!?!  I’ve decided to take a step back for a while and stop worrying what my Analytics say or if I’m popular and just get back to enjoying having my own writing space.

This weekend I’m going to try and wean myself off gently and stay offline for the whole weekend.....yikes already I’m beginning to feel a bit panicky but will anything go wrong in my life if I don’t check Twitter every 10 minutes?.....probably not!!!  So what will I do with a cyber free weekend????

I’m going to hang out with my Beautiful Chick and be silly. 

I’m going to sleep......at least as much as Chick will let me!!!

I may or not clean the house from top to bottom.

I’m going to go for a run in the Countryside and enjoy the fresh air.

I’m going to try to stay off the vodka (or maybe have a couple of glasses less ;-)

We are going to see Alice in Wonderland in 3D.....not sure who is most excited about this one.

Sunday is Mothers Day and as a treat to me, we are going to raid Blockbusters and stay home for the entire day watching T.V. or reading books.  I cannot wait.

Hope that you all have a fabulous weekend/Mothers Day too!

Tuesday 9 March 2010

Kids say the funniest things!?!

Chick is an absolute character who makes me giggle with some of her thoughts and conversations.  For instance on Saturday afternoon we were driving in the car and had the following conversation:

Chick:  Mum, why is that man sitting on the floor?

Me:  I'm not sure Boo.  Maybe he's feels ill....perhaps he's sick or dizzy.

Chick:  Maybe he has afternoonitis!

Me: Er.....what?

Chick:  Afternoonitis.  It's the thing that Miss Waldron says I have in the afternoon when I'm not doing any work!!!!!!!!

............................................................................

In the car on the way to school this morning, talking about the 2 minutes she managed to catch of a certain soap last night:

Chick:  Mum, you know that girl last night on t.v?  The teenage one who got pregnant?

Me:  Yes

Chick:  How did she get pregnant when she's only a teenager and not married?

Me:  erm.....cough, splutter (trying to think verrrrry quickly).....erm......

Chick:  Did she manage it the same way you and Dad did when you weren't married?

Me:  erm.....cough, splutter (trying to think verrrrry quickly).....erm......Sideways glance at Chick!

Chick:  Let me guess?  You'll tell me when I'm older?

Me:  Frantically nodding and trying not to wet myself laughing!!!!!!

Chick constantly amazes me with her astuteness and her understanding of the world around her.  The older she gets the more I want to wrap her in cotton wool and keep her innocence!  Oh well......lets hope I can just keep her away from boys until she's about 17!!!!!

Monday 8 March 2010

I'm thinking


I'm having many random thoughts today which are shooting off in all directions and I can't turn them into a coherent post so I'll share with you some of meanderings:

* What do I want from this blog? This has been one of my top thoughts.  Some days I want to be an Uber Blogger with 500 followers all leaving me lovely comments.  Then I think what a pressure that would be and how I'd have to address the fact that I've got no grammatical skills and so kind of go off the idea.  Also where would I find the time to communicate with everyone???

* Time is becoming a problem.....there just isn't enough of it!  For instance I'm trying to keep up with Project 365 but due to time constraints keep missing the pictures I want.  I always thought that if I won the lottery the nicest thing would be being able to wear a different pair of Louboutins or Manolos every day however, I'm beginning to think that true luxury would be not having to rush around everywhere, as well of course as being able to pay someone to do the housework!!!!

* Mum's birthday was a lot of fun at the weekend.  She was wearing a purple Herve Leger bandage dress and looked hawt and absolutely amazing which makes me wonder what the bloody hell I'm doing with my life!!!  It's a sad state of affairs when your Mother looks better than you do on a Saturday night!!!!!  Made me pull my finger out and do some exercise today though...thanks Mum xxx

* Talking of which...the meal we went for was rather bizarre.  We went to a place called 'The Dining Room' and I'd pre-ordered a nice slab of prime steak.  My Mum's Partner got his first and I stupidly naively said 'Gosh, that doesn't look very well done' and he's all 'No Emma, it's not....you have to cook it yourself'!!!  WTF? Yeah, so basically it's comes out on a hot stone and you chop off hunks of beef and cook it yourself on the hot stone.....bizarre is the only word I can use although everyone else loved it!!!

* Maybe I'll write a book called 'Confessions of a HR Department' because you wouldn't believe the weirdness I encounter on a day to day basis.  Anything from maternity cases to bereavement to employees being stalked to candidates talking to my breasts instead of my face!!!!  I don't need to watch Jerry Springer because his potential guests wander through my office every day!!!!

*  Still haven't heard anything from Hertz.  Am thinking I may start writing to them every single hour until I get a response.  Would this be considered stalking????  Maybe I could put it down to being unhinged due to the stress of trying to recover my own sodding money!

*  I've also been wondering why I'm so rubbish with Technology!!  I use Twitter but I don't really get it and it makes me feel like some weird stalker...can you still blog and not be a Twitterer?  I need to upgrade my phone too and have been debating Blackberry versus iPhone and then I remember how long it takes me to pick stuff up and how all I really want to do is make calls, text and surf the net and I put it off for another week.......I think I must be getting old ;-)

Well after writing all that I'm still directionless and have no answers so I'm off for a hot bath and an early night!!!!!

Friday 5 March 2010

Reviews & Giveaways!!!

I occasionally get e-mails that go something like this:

Dear Blogger

Please review our air freshener/washing powder/dog food on your blog and tell your Readers what a fabulous product we have.

Your Sincerely
A Big Company

Generally I just delete them because a) I have an actual name which isn't exactly difficult to find on my blog and you are obviously just being lazy b) I'm not really a dog food kind of girl and c) just no, I'm sure my readers couldn't give a Monkey's nuts about which air freshener I may have gotten for free!!!!!

On Wednesday I received another one of these e-mails but this time the sender had put my first name and included my blog name in the text and was wondering if I would like to review a DVD that is coming out soon. The film contains a couple of people I've heard of so I shallowly e-mailed back something along the lines of:

Dear Person

Thank you for inviting me to review this DVD but this isn't something I'd normally subject my readers too.  However, I may be able to arouse their interest if you can get me an interview with Ben Affleck.

Yours
Emma

I'd like to apologise for my shallowness but hello.....Ben Affleck who I should probably mention I have a history with.....he waved at me, Nicole & Carol at some traffic lights in L.A. about 10 years ago!!!  So I giggled a bit at the thought of having Afternoon Tea with Ben at the Ritz and then carried on with my Payroll Input!! (Yep, Rock 'n' Roll lifestyle me!!!)

Anways later that day I received a response back saying unfortunately Ben was unavailable (boooo.....hisss!!) but she could possibly set something up with Actor Jason Bateman or John Altschuler so would I be interested.  I did a little research (Oh, Google how I love thee) and then giggled a bit more and couldn't decide if to say yes or not so I called my little Brother and our conversation went something like this:


Me: Hey Kid, I'm sorry to wake you up at lunchtime but have you ever heard of  Jason Bateman or John Altschuler?


Kid: I know who Jason is why?


Me:  Well I've had this e-mail (and I explain the above) and I'm not sure whether to do it or not?


Kid:  So you are asking me to tell you if you should go ahead and interview a Hollywood Star or the man behind the second most popular cartoon series ever?


Me:  I guess?  But what do I know about interviewing?


Kid:  Erm......Emma what do you do for a living?


Me: ?????? ahem (small voice)  I interview people!!??!


Kid:  So what do you think the answer to your question is?


Me:  ?????? ahem (small voice)  I think that maybe I'll e-mail back and see if the nice Lady can set something up!!!

Kid:  Awesome now I'm going back to sleep!!!!

So I e-mailed back the nice Lady who is going to send me two copies (one for me and one to give away if it's any good!!!) of said DVD and also see what she can set up and with whom.  I may be a teeny bit excited at the prospect and I may already have huge lists of questions that I want to ask them both.  Apparently it will be a telephone or Skype interview which isn't as exciting as a face-to-face interview but still.....aaarrrggghhh.

Ever the pessimist though I still am not sure that I'm doing the right thing!! What if they are setting me up and I'm being pranked or something? Then I talk myself down and say gosh what a waste of their time if it's just a prank!!!!  Also I'm not sure if any of you would be interested in reading my thoughts and opinions on DVD's or washing powder or dog food so I guess it's over to you guys!  What do you think?  Would you be interested? Am I losing the plot completely?????

Wednesday 3 March 2010

Almost Wordless Wednesday

Happy Birthday Mum!!!

Tuesday 2 March 2010

When will I learn?????

I don’t know if I can put into words what I feel today about Chick’s Dad.  I go through varying emotions day to day.  Sometimes hate, sometimes love, sometimes indifference but mainly complete and utter frustration!
I’ve known him for at least 10 years now and I’m still no closer to fathoming out what makes him tick.  I like to think that he isn’t a bad man and he truly isn’t however, he is one of the most ineffectual human beings I ever met.

He is a brilliant Dad, when he’s with her, but that’s easy considering he is only with Chick an hour a week.  I’m sure she’d think that I was fun if she only spent one hour a week with me and not the other 167 as well!!

Today is another day, when I was already spent when I got home but, he is always able to draw me in and make me laugh.  I love and hate this about him in equal measure.  Hate it because I don’t want him to make me laugh or to find him fun. Love it because I remember just what I always liked about him and how easily we get on together and sadly I have to admit it makes me gooey inside on the odd occasion that I forget he’s a dick and we play happy families together!!!

He is a good Dad but I want him to be more involved.  I want him to actually pay for his Daughter instead of me struggling all the time.  I want him to want to attend Parents Evening and not just come on the nights when I can force him too.  I want him to take care of his daughter for more than an hour. I don't think I'm asking a lot!?!

It also really bugs me that I still find him sooooo handsome (although many would disagree)!  I would hate for him to know this but I find him devastatingly heart-stoppingly gorgeous, even at the same time as hating every bone in his body. It makes it worse that I get the feeling he still fancies me too....yikes!!!

On the other hand I don’t know what to do about this?  It bothers me that I feel the need to drink every Tuesday night to get over his visit!  When will I ever get to the point when he stops affecting me?  Why can I not get over him even though he’s a complete and utter Muppet???? How do I get him to spend more time with Chick without forcing either of them into it? My main question though is when will I stop being so fu**ing ridiculous???  Answers on a postcard please!!!

Monday 1 March 2010

Monday Blues

I've had quite a crappy day, starting with a tyre puncture at 8.30am on the way to take Chick to School and ending with my Daughters delightful Father informing me that he can't be bothered to attend Parents Evening!!!  I'm not going to bitch about my day because I'm feeling quite miserable already and putting it all down in writing isn't going to make me feel any better so instead I'll share my lovely weekend with you.

Chick and I went to see one of my best friends who lives in London.  Friday night involved lots of vino as Friday nights should.  Saturday involved some of my favourite things in the world:



Shopping at one of the best shops in the World....Harrods!  I truly love it and it is my spiritual home......then of course I have to wake up and smell the roses because all that I can afford from Harrods in reality is:



Ooohhhhh Krispy Kreme......almost better than sex some days, I swear!!!!  And of course no trip to London would be complete without buying more shoes:


They are amazing but so high that I'll be surprised if I don't break my neck the first time I wear them!!!  Of course we also had to do something for Chick and her favourite thing to do in London is the Science Museum:


I also love the Science Museum because not only is it fun but its completely free!!!  This is Chick with Carol. 

Saturday night then involved massive amounts of vodka and staying up talking until the early hours of the Morning.   Talking about the good stuff I feel better already.  Hope that you are all having a better Monday than me!!