Friday 25 June 2010

Letters of Intent

Foursons

Having one of those days, moths, years?  Want to sound off about the things or people that annoy you? Then grab a button from Julie over at Foursons and write your very own Letter of Intent.

Please note that if you are offended by bad language you shouldn't carry on past Letter 4!!!!


Dear Family and Friends

Thank you for buying me such lovely cards and presents for my birthday, even after my insistence that I'm not celebrating anymore now that I'm 29!!!  You rock and I love you all and am truly very grateful for each and every one of you.

Love
The Soppy Girl who's pretending she's 29!!!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Nick

Thank you so much for offering to give me the money to go and see Bon Jovi for a third and final time!  You are not so bad for an annoying Little Brother ;-)

Love 
Me xx
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Jon Bon Jovi

I take back everything I said in my last Letter of Intent.  You are still quite hot and I wouldn't kick you out of bed for eating biscuits!!!

Love
The woman who really needs to get a grip!!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Chick

I love you more than life itself but you have to start sleeping at night.  If you can't go to sleep you have to learn to lay there quietly and stop waking me up every 5 minutes.  I'm not sure how many more sleepless nights I can take.

Love 
The extremely grumpy woman that you have to live with!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Transport for London

I HATE YOU WITH A PASSION!  

Seriously!  It's bad enough that every weekend when I'm in London most of the tubes aren't working and I have to catch a bus with the common people!  This is not a fun experience and I don't enjoy it one single bit! It's also really annoying that each journey takes twice as long as it should, due to said bus service.

A couple of weeks ago, I happened to have the misfortune of driving in your beautiful City.  It took me two hours to drive approximately 7 miles to collect my daughter.  I'm sure you'll agree that this is ever so slightly frustrating.  However as I collected the daughter and tried to leave your beautiful City we got caught in yet another traffic jam...this time due to a bridge being closed.  I may have inched forward and made it through the traffic lights whereupon I got stuck behind another car and didn't make it fully across the lights.

Now I understand that this is a Red Route (no stopping zone for you out of towners) but I wasn't actually in the way, even though my two back tyres were in the yellow box.  Anywhere else in the UK this is just called bad driving or is understandable but apparently in London it's completely illegal!

Imagine my joy when on my birthday I received a delightful letter from yourselves, informing me that I had been photographed by one of your Camera Operators and am being charged £120 for the privilege.  

£120.....you are having a FUCKING laugh!  120 of my hard earned English Pounds will have to spent on a FUCKING driving violation.  

I seriously hope that when I pay the £120 on my card it causes a virus to enter your computer system and die!!!

Love
The woman who has been saying fuck an awful lot this week!!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Camera Operator who works for Transport for London

Get a proper job, Dickhead!

Love
The woman who will be cursing you to hell for at least the foreseeable future!

9 comments:

  1. Happy Belated 29th Birthday! Enjoy the concert!

    Those cameras on traffic lights ought to be illegal. If the city wants to hand out tickets then maybe they should man the streets with police. Seems like such an outrage that they sit and watch video to write out tickets.

    Thanks for linking up!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks for fair warning about the language. I carried on anyway and OUCH! I don't blame you for being upset! That's a LOT of money!

    ReplyDelete
  3. PS ... Now following your blog and I grabbed your button for my collection. :)

    ReplyDelete
  4. @Foursons......No problem....thanks for giving me an outlet to vent!!!

    @Beth.....Thanks for the follow. Will be by to visit soon!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I NEEEEEEED that vent button and will use it on one of my pages!!!! I hate those camera things...got caught myself -- doing a special favor for my daughter who couldn't walk because a truck ran over her foot and 'degloved' (med term) it...where are the sensitivies?... so that's about $240 American dollars? Ouch...and, on your birthday...bad people skills, those Londoners...happy 29th (x ?), anyway...

    Twitter: SolarChief

    ReplyDelete
  6. @Sharlene....Be sure to go ahead and use it, I always feel much better!!!! It's such a lot of money....Oh well, you live and learn!!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. What a fun idea-I may have to write some letters of my own.

    ReplyDelete
  8. haha, I love that you're pretending to be 29 :) I'm going to do the same from here on out :) I refuse to turn 30!

    ReplyDelete
  9. @amyblam.....you definitely should write some of your own!!

    @Crystal.....You should stay with me at 29....it's a great age ;-)

    ReplyDelete